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Instead of carrying grudges around forever, torch them. Then they were asked to estimate the chances that they would get divorced. The problem with this statistic is that, if there is no perceived risk of failure, no "work" is put into maintaining the relationship—until it's suddenly faltering. Don't forget to make an effort to keep your romance alive. Bowman suggests that you work on it a little at a time as a way to notice what your spouse does right (since these are the things you'd likely eulogize him with, not the negatives). That fact is, "you are not stuck; you have choices....

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